- ISBN13: 9781590770771
- Condition: NEW
- Notes: Brand New from Publisher. No Remainder Mark.
Product Description
Written with the compassionate language that people have come to rely upon and expect from these proven relationship experts, this book goes beyond an explanation of the condition to help men and women avoid the self-destructive permanence of remaining with people incapable of loving anyone but themselves…. More >>
Help, I’m in Love with a Narcissist

I NEVER ordered this item.
This was CLEARLY an AMAZON mistake.
Rating: 1 / 5
These 2 authors consistently write intelligent, informative books that help us negotiate our way through life, relationships, and seeing the red light signs of “getting out.”
I have always admired these 2 authors and read everything that they write.
Sherri Rosen
Sherri Rosen Publicity LLC, New York
Rating: 5 / 5
“According to the American Psychiatric Association, narcissism is considered a form of depressive illness, as the life of the typical narcissist is often rife with recurrent bouts of dysphoria, feelings of sadness and hopelessness, and anhedonia, the loss of the ability to feel pleasure.” (Michael Largo, author of Final Exits: The Illustrated Encyclopedia of How We Die)
Clearly, the advice Steven Carter and Julia Sokol provide can not only help people minimize the emotional damage inflicted upon them by narcissistic lovers/spouses; it might even save their lives. Largo, in the above referenced book, cites the case of Gig Young, a severe narcissist (Hollywood actor) who could never be satisfied with his life; he killed his wife of three weeks and then himself, in 1978. That’s one sad final exit.
Ultimately, narcissists can never achieve the feeling of gratification they often ruthlessly pursue. They may temporarily attain their fantasies of grandiosity, especially if they’re some sort of celebrity (Gig Young won a Best Supporting Actor Academy Award in 1969). However, when there’s not enough recognition, unlimited success, or power for them to feel fulfilled; watch out. That’s when things can get out of control.
If the narcissist obtains enough power…I won’t even go there. Let’s hope that hasn’t already happened…
Rating: 5 / 5
Time flies when it’s all about you
I recently went on a hike with two of my closest and smartest guy friends (an investment banker and a lawyer). When we returned to the car I remarked, “Did the way back to the car seem much shorter than when we hiked out on the trail?”
My first friend said, “I didn’t notice much of a difference.”
My second friend said, “That’s because you did most of the talking.”
I was embarrassed and quipped back, “That must explain why the first half seemed to take so long.”
I am more neurotic than I am narcissistic, which means I feel hurt much more often than I feel angry. It explained to me why I may get along with so many people, because I am generally more of a listener than a talker.
It also made me aware of how quickly narcissists can become angry and even enraged when they’re not catered to. Narcissists are often very attractive, because they seem so strong and when they’re romancing you, they can make you feel: “This person (most often men, but increasingly now also women) will take care of me and protect me from harm.” The problem is that early on when you are the object of desire you can feel that way, but after they have you, too often you learn that their strength is mainly stubbornness and their desire is more often liking you for the way you make them feel about themselves. It turns out not to be about liking you.
As a result, it is a wise thing to smoke out narcissists, before you become involved with one. Here is how to do it:
1. Get them talking to the point where they are going on and on and seem to be enjoying themselves.
2. After they finish say to them: “Gee, I can really appreciate how much you enjoy talking about ________ (fill in the blank about the main subject they were speaking about).
3. Wait for them to nod or say, “Yes.”
4. Then say with a coy smile: “You would have enjoyed it even more, if I was listening.”
That may seem cruel, but in reality it is teasing someone who may be a little too full of themselves. The neurotic will get embarrassed (as I did above); the narcissist will show a flash of anger.
If you are dealing with a narcissist, run. Think you can change one, think again and read Steven Carter’s and Julia Sokol’s wonderful book: “Help! I’m in love with a Narcissist.”
-Mark Goulston, M.D.
author: The 6 Secrets of a Lasting Relationship
http:/markgoulston.com
Rating: 5 / 5
I was married for almost 6 Years to a narcissist. I had so many questions when he divorced me, because I caught him cheating, while I was away taking care of my aging mother, who needed care. He denied, denied, denied, and when I caught him in a lie, he couldn’t stand it and turned it to me. I was devistated and didn’t know what I could of done to have him love me like I loved him. After reading this book, it has answed so many questions, I now know that nothing I could have done, would of pleased him—-ever!!! Thank you for helping me heal, and this is a MUST read for those who are connected to a “me me” person. Susan in Nebraska
Rating: 5 / 5